Global Warming

Guest How do we solve global warming?

Really getting down to the tough ones, aren't we? Ok, well don't worry; A ManStallion always knows the answer and this is no different.

Lets start with some background. This issue has gotten pretty "heated" *ahem* lately and popular songs like Fire Burning, Its Getting Hot in Here, and some older ones like Ring of Fire and Hot in the City are only contributing to the blaze. But don't worry, this isn't like Voldemort, just saying "hot" won't make it true.

The argument basically says that as we burn fossil fuels we release gases into the atmosphere that trap heat from the sun and are causing permanent climate shift. Critics point to evidence of temperature cycles as proof that we are merely going through a hot phase. But regardless of the possibility of global warming, ManStallions still think that reducing our usage of fossil fuels is a good thing. So here's what we've done to help contribute. On weekends we sing to growing trees to help them mature faster and absorb more CO2. And every day we spend at least twenty minutes throwing ice cubes at the sun. Take that! But these are small scale. Throwing ice at the sun will make him think twice about sending so much heat our way, but its not a permanent solution.

So ManStallions have teamed up with some local engineers to come up with a great strategy. ManStallions volunteered three weeks of our time during the summer to spend in a specially designed exercise room. Essentially we're going to run for three weeks straight and produce enough body heat to boil water and create steam which will spin turbines to create electricity. We estimate that in those three weeks we can produce enough power to eliminate the need for traditional power plants until 2014. No need to burn oil, we'll just get fit! ManStallions always try to kill two birds with one stone. And not always literally.

ManStallions and Athletics

Guest Do Manstallions excel at any sport besides track?

Great question, especially given that the two known ManStallions run track competitively. To answer this I will call on the expertise of others as well as highlighting my own experiences. First, lets consider that ManStallions are not simply runners. We are decathletes. The decathlon is, "the supreme test of all-around athleticism."

We compete in ten events testing our speed, strength, power, agility and endurance. The crucial elements of any athlete. To combine these skills into one human demands that he be larger than average. Decathletes tend to be between 6'0-6'3, weighing between 180-200 lbs, however due to the unique demands of our event there have been larger and smaller successful competitors.

Now, the ManStallion, who many would consider a bastion of athleticism, is obviously predisposed toward decathlon greatness. Not only do our physical skills suit the event perfectly, but our comradely, relaxed nature complement the challenging environment of the decathlon.

So if you combine the superhuman athletic prowess of a ManStallion with the training and experience of a decathlete, what do you get? As many would say, "The World's Greatest Athlete." I think its safe to say that we could dominate any sport we choose, but so far we haven't found another worthy of our attention.

For further reading please see: http://www.faqs.org/sports-science/Ce-Do/Decathlon.html, http://decathlonusa.typepad.com/deca/nature.html

Thanks!

First of all, I'd like to say thank you to our budding fan base! We've received a lot of positive feedback and are excited to be providing you all with a little fun in your hectic lives.

We've got a lot of plans for expansion in the works. We're hoping to premier our ManStallion Meals webisode series to you by next week. In this segment we will highlight how you can live the ManStallion lifestyle in the kitchen. What to cook, how to cook it, these are every day questions that we will give you the answers for.

We've also begun planning for our ManStallion Apparel line. We want to give you a way to support your local ManStallions in style. Simple, yet classy. Classical. Timeless. You should be able to feel sexy and confident in attire that epitomizes your lifestyle. This is what you can look forward to in our upcoming clothing line.

If time allows we also want to bring you the long awaited second part to our ManStallion How To series. We know ManStallion Entertainment hasn't been everything that a ManStallion branded product should be and we're going to fix that. I won't spoil the surprise, but I will tell you that this segment will get at the very roots of the idea that is ManStallion.

Again, thanks everyone for your support, stay tuned for more content! And keep sending questions, we're happy to answer them.

Studying-ManStallion Style

We were working together,* leveraging each others strengths and bodies to study for an exam. After getting the first example right we stopped. Why? You ask. A ManStallion brain is like a hiker reaching the summit of a mountain. Once you're at the top there's nowhere to go but down. Unless you have a jetpack. But our brains don't have jetpacks.

*Last time we did this we discovered the photoelectric effect, but as our friend Albert (Einstein) was turning 26 soon, we decided to give him our documents as a birthday present. And just look how that early burst of inspiration motivated him!

Boxers of Briefs?

Guest: Boxers or briefs?

It depends on need, functionality, and accessibility. There is a great brand that we have specially imported from Thailand, appropriately named Saddles. But if you have trouble finding that the next best thing would be Jockey.

The first ManStallion?

Guest Who was the first of the ManStallion kind?

Great question, guest. As I mentioned in my previous post, ManStallions created the Earth. The first (and only) time we ever tried our hardest at something we created the world in which we all live.

But, you ask, who was the first? Well, ManStallions are like matter. We are neither created nor destroyed. We do however, recycle. Through intense concentration we can actually switch from aging (like humans do) to younging, where we actually lose age. We do this when we get bored with our current form and decide to reinvent ourselves.

ManStallions v. The Team

A brave albeit misguided peer (I use the term loosely to confer respect on him), tried to use economic theory to explain why the ManStallion combined decathlon score is lower than the team combined decathlon score. He was close, but alas, misinformed. Apparently he has never heard the age-old adage, "A ManStallion never gives 100%, because to create another Earth would be superfluous." Obviously the reason for our lower score is that we like to foster an atmosphere of competition; it wouldn't be very fun for anyone if I ran the 100m in 3.72 seconds at every meet would it?

Guest write:

"In honor of my Business Econ midterm tomorrow which I have been studying for feverishly, I would like to take this opportunity to point that it is the Low-Hanging Fruit Principle is responsible for the team's victory over the ManStallions. That is to say, by specializing, the production possibility curve is expanded. Being the "jack-of-all-trades" is mighty cool, but not efficient."

I respond:

In honor of my being superior to you I will clarify this difficult (for you) principle as it relates to ManStallions.

The low-hanging fruit principle, in general, states that those tasks that are relatively easily accomplished and yield relatively large improvements should be completed first. For instance, if I were tasked with revamping Emory's culture*, I would first start with those areas that were easy to finish and yielded large gains. I would establish protocols making it impossible for anyone from Long Island to gain admission (an easy filter) which would then increase average coolness, decrease prominence of tights as pants, and free up those tables outside Cox (large improvements).

That being said, lets apply this principle to Emory Track and Field. Lets say that the task at hand is winning conference (scoring as many points as possible). How do I go about this? I take someone remarkably talented, train them in many events (easy; especially if its a ManStallion) and set them loose to score in many different events (Large improvements)! I think Coach Curtin may have a degree in economics! Instead of wasting their time with fragile sprinters who may, in any given meet, compete in, say, 4 events, we've invested in ManStallions who train for 10 events and will probably win all of them because everyone else will withdraw for fear of being embarrassed.

*They did ask me to do this over the summer; I declined as I was busy refurbishing train stations to make them more efficient in the area of heat retention and designing suspension bridges for Denmark

The Mailbag

• Guest Is ManStallion two words or one?!

The proper format is "ManStallion." The etymological root emphasizes that we are at once a Man and a Stallion. English convention dictates that one word be before the other. Our native neigh does not put a chronological emphasis on either part of the term, allowing us to more correctly portray the equality of our kind.

• 2009-10-26 1:03 AM

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• Guest What's the optimal number of ManStallions to change a lightbulb?
• Great question, most people actually don't know but ManStallions actually played a large part in the development of electricity and the light bulb. Oxidation was the primary problem, we found, when selecting a filament material but we outsourced that tedious work to various scientists who were eager to work with us. Anyway, back to your question, ManStallions actually frequently use echolocation so technically we don't even need light to navigate. In order to make our human brethren more comfortable, however, we do frequently live in well lit areas. I disdain such menial labor as changing light bulbs, so I actually drew up a rather clever solution.

This automatic light bulb changer, while rather complex, is now under patent by Thomas Magdi, to whom I sold the design in early 2004. So, 0. It takes 0 ManStallions to change a light bulb.

The ManStallion Philosophy

Our blog is meant to highlight the full extent of the ManStallion lifestyle. What we eat, drink, or wear. Sleep patterns, hobbies, interests, strengths and weaknesses. Our mystique.

It may be coincidence that all surviving ManStallions are decathletes, however we often succumb to some of the pre-eminent myths that surround this event. A Jack-of-all-Trades, Master-of-none. Yes, perhaps thats a fitting description of a decathlete. You could argue that the decision to pursue 10 events effectively destroys your possibility of truly mastering any. Not true for the ManStallion. Our ceaseless thirst for knowledge and limitless energy allow us to canter through the meadows of Track. We gallop toward challenge, hurdle obstacles and scoff at victory. Victory implies the possibility of defeat. We, ManStallions, pursue all endeavors equally and soon become Master of All Trades. I am equally adept at shot put, carpentry, rabbit hunting and pain tolerance. While the skills and traits we possess may seem daunting and intimidating to some, do not be afraid. We are a gentle, loving breed, known for our extroverted, fun loving personalities. We accept all into our herd who are willing and qualified. Our numbers may be small but our aura is without boundary. There is an old French proverb that translates roughly as "The stable wears out the horse more than the road." We were born to run, not just down the track, but through the forests of intellect, over the tundra of competition and over the seas of curiosity.

1500 Meter Run

A Guest has asked:

" What does a Man Stallion run a 1500 in?"

Answer: Every Man Stallion strives to run the 1500 meter race in 4 minutes and 20 seconds. We try to do everything in increments of 420 if possible.

Great question keep them coming.

Is it ok for Man Stallions to watch Glee?

Great question. While singing and dancing may not be typically thought of as what Man Stallions do in there spare time, much of which is spent building fires, hunting, sharpening knifes, and shaving, it is acceptable. To meet your musical quota watch Glee on Fox, it will be a good time.

Man Stallions Should be Watching This

Right know I am suggesting that you begin to watch Modern Family on ABC. It's great. On the left side of our blog you will see an area that says "Man Stallion Entertainment". Here you will find a link to the show along with links to other shows as they get the Man Stallion seal of approval. Enjoy.

Magic Mouse more like Man Stallion Mouse

Apple came out today with their new Magic Mouse. This mouse has multi-touch capabilites. Too bad we, the Man Stallions, thought of this first. They copied us but so did Thomas Edison with the phonograph so we are used to it. For more info on this new tight mouse ManStallion Search that shiz.

Emory Homecoming Rain or Shine

Parades are very similar to stampedes...so we like them.

Man Stallion Haircare

This is critical. All Man Stallions and Man Stallions in training are and should be using Pantene Shampoo AND Conditioner. Conditioner is critical... everyday...I don't care what the experts say...I am the expert. Do it and look sexy.

Party in the USA is in Nashville

So I just watched the new Miley Cyrus video and was not happy with it, except the American flag is epic. She is having a party in the country, they all have cowboy boots on, she is not in LA... it does not make sense. She should have gotten off a plane in LA and been all country and walked around the city singing about how she has butterflies cause she does not fit in. Oh well, next time get that produced by a Man Stallion. Here is the video, watch for yourself.

Man Stallion Meals

Just in... canned tuna mixed with Easy-Mac.... delicious.... try it now.

I boiled some water

It was early evening and I felt a bit parched. What does the gecko do when he can't find the cricket? I know, that's what I thought too. So I put some water on to boil and broke out the Liptons. Tea is making a come back circa 1773. Stephen mentioned the boiling point of water, 212 fahrenheit, and I thought to myself, "Why should I risk burning myself, global warming and arctic melting. There must be a better way to do this." So I perfected LaserEyes and did some basic stoichiometry in my head and boiled water with lasers from my eyes. Its really amazing what you can do when you put your mind to it.

Fraternity Boy hooks up with a 15 year-old.

This past weekend a brother at a particular fraternity hooked up with a 15 year-old girl visiting her cousin on campus. I don't really know what to say about this except that Man Stallions don't do this.